Can Anxiety Therapy in Portland Help You Feel More Confident and Secure?
Feeling confident doesn't mean you're never anxious, it means learning to trust yourself even when anxiety shows up. Anxieety therapy in Portland and across Oregon can help you get there.
As a therapist offering anxiety therapy in Portland and throughout Oregon, I work with people who are burned out from walking through the world on constant high alert. It’s not uncommon to be able to look composed on the outside but constantly feel like your insides are spinning and churning with unease. If that resonates with your experience out here in the world, please know that you’re not alone in this. There’s a reason it feels this hard.
If you’re struggling with anxiety, chances are you spend an pretty large chunk of your time in your head. Overthinking. Second-guessing. Wondering how things will go or if you’ll be able to do the thing well without embarrassing yourself. Isn’t it exhausting? I know from experience how draining it can be and how stuck it can feel. There’s also that longing attached to the experience, that hope of feeling more confident in ourselves and more secure in our daily lives.
Why Anxiety Makes Confidence Seem So Elusive
Worry is one of the most easily recognizable experiences associated with anxiety but it isn’t the whole of how we can experience it. Anxiety can also come through our inner narrator that questions everything, our choices, our feelings, and even our self-worth. This narrator could be sounding the alarm to help us avoid mistakes or embarrassment. The result? Often we end up feeling small, stuck, or like we’re never quite enough.
We may notice ourselves replaying conversations, trying to predict the “right” answer, or avoiding decisions altogether because the fear of getting it wrong feels so overwhelming (and with that built in human negativity bias, it’s much easier to imagine it all going downhill than it is to imagine things going smoothly or well). Confidence, in this context, isn’t about being bold or assertive as we may have taught that confidence “looks” like. This type of confidence is about being able to trust your own experience, which includes trusting your innate ability to take care of your needs even when anxious.
Feeling More Secure Starts in the Nervous System
When our systems are perpetually scanning for what could go wrong, of course it would be hard to feel safe in our bodies or our choices. We really don’t build that sense of inner security doesn’t come from forcing positivity or pushing anxiety away. We don’t lie to ourselves out of our experiences. However, we can begin to cultivate more confidence and sense of security from learning how to recognize the patterns that are running in the background and building a relationship with them. A relationship that’s based in curiosity, not self-criticism.
In therapy, we get to explore what safety actually feels like for you. That could include learning to notice when your body is tensing up, creating small practices or routines that help anchor you during anxious moments, or developing language for the parts of you that are trying to protect you in ways that no longer serve you.
When we are able to feel more grounded in our bodies, we can also begin to trust our own intuitions and signals instead of doubting them or just shoving them down. Safety and security are not about having all the answers (no one does), but can be strengthened as you gain more experience guiding yourself through the unknown or seeing that you can support yourself through a mistakes or failures to develop more flexibility and wisdom.
Confidence Isn’t the Absence of Anxiety
So often, clients come in with the hope that therapy will make anxiety disappear. While the experience of anxiety may soften over time, the goal isn’t to erase it. The goal is to build a stronger relationship to it, one where you’re in the lead.
Sort of like how a seasoned actor or athlete may feel anxiety before a performance or a game, you might still feel nervous before a conversation or overwhelmed by the prospect of having to make a big decision…but instead of spiraling or shutting down, you start noticing the early cues. You pause. You breathe. You respond with more choice and care than panic and want to hit the eject button.
That shift, from feeling hijacked by anxiety to gently navigating it, is one of the clearest signs of growing confidence. You really don’t have to be fearless to be secure. You just have to trust that you can handle what arises without abandoning yourself.
When Shame Has Been the Default Setting
For many of us, anxiety is deeply tied to shame. Are you also familiar with that internal voice that says, “You’re too much,” or “You should have known better?” Often, even are harshest inner critics are trying to protect us from experiences like judgment, rejection, and failure. This can be a confusing perspective to take when it’s also true that how it’s doing it creates more pain.
In psychotherapy for anxiety in Portland, we slow things down and tune in to listen to what those parts of you are really afraid of. Could they have learned that being vigilant was the only way to keep you safe? Or that making a mistake could mean losing an important connection? Once we understand the beliefs behind the shaming and self-criticism, you can begin to shift the dynamic. You can gain more clarity and choice, knowing that shame doesn’t have to be your motivator and that you can care for yourself without tearing yourself down.
What Confidence Can Look Like
How you experience confidence will be unique to you. For some it may be experienced as a quiet clarity. Like being able to say “no” without excessive guilt. Like feeling your emotions and caring for them without being consumed by them. Like knowing that you can ask for help and still be strong.
Confidence for you might mean recognizing when you’re starting to spin, and choosing to pause. Or it could be feeling safe enough to show up as your full self, even when it feels vulnerable.
Developing and cultivating confidence isn’t about becoming a new version of yourself. It’s about coming home to yourself, and trusting that you’re allowed to take up space there.
Ready to Feel More Grounded in Who You Are?
You don’t have to keep bracing for impact or walking on eggshells around your own mind. Therapy can help you build the kind of internal safety that makes confidence possible; one session, one breath, one compassionate moment at a time.
If you’re exploring counseling for anxiety in Oregon and wondering if we might be a good fit, I invite you to schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation. We’ll talk about what’s going on, what you’re hoping for, and how we might work together to help you feel more confident and secure in your life.
Author Bio
Eric Goodwin, LPC, offers LGBTQ+ affirming online anxiety therapy across Oregon, helping clients build confidence and emotional clarity.
Eric Goodwin (he/they) offers online anxiety therapy in Portland and across Oregon. With a grounding in LGBTQ+ affirming therapy, mindful self-compassion, and parts-work informed by Internal Family Systems, Eric helps clients build deeper confidence and emotional security; especially when anxiety has taken the wheel. Reach out for a free consultation by calling (971) 533-5590 or clicking here to see for online sessions in Portland and across the state of Oregon.
FAQs About Confidence, Security and Anxiety Therapy in Portland
Is it normal to feel like anxiety is stealing my confidence?
Yes, this is an experience you share with many others. Hyper-awareness and self-doubt are frequent flyers with anxiety, which can make it hard to trust your choices and intuition. Therapy can help you to rebuild that trust through a mix of nervous system work, emotional exploration, and real-life skills.
Will I always feel this anxious?
One experience all we humans share is that no experience stays the same. While anxiety may never disappear entirely, therapy can support you in shifting from being controlled by it to being in relationship with it. That shift creates space for confidence, clarity, and self-trust, which can all be helpful in reducing the intensity and frequency of anxiety.
What if I’ve never felt confident in my life?
That’s as valid of a starting point as any. Therapy doesn’t require you to come in with confidence, it helps you to build it from the inside out. Even noticing that you want more confidence is a powerful place to begin.
Can you help if I also feel shame about being anxious?
Yes. Many clients feel stuck in shame about “still struggling” or “being too much.” In our work together, we explore those shame stories with care and work toward more compassionate ways of being with yourself.
Do you offer LGBTQ+ affirming therapy for anxiety?
Yes. My practice is Queer-affirming and I specialize in LGBTQIA+ affirming therapy. My approach is deeply respectful of each client’s lived experience. You’re welcome here exactly as you are.